Masz czasem tak, że leżysz i chcesz

Masz czasem tak, że leżysz i chcesz wstać ale wszystko wydaje się być zamówione przeciwko tobie? Że wszystko nagle pragnie sprawić żebyś przypadkiem czegoś nie zrobił? Jednak to wszystko ma jakiś początek. Możesz być na przykład zmęczony po ciężkim treningu. Albo po całym dniu w pracy. Albo dlatego że jesteś chory.
Jednak to wszystko może być także powiązane ze stratą. Twój umysł stwierdza, że skoro ten kto był Twoją oporą nagle znika. Nie ma go. Bum i wszystko staje się szare i bezcelowe. Nawet nie chce ci się wstać z łóżka.
Ale myślisz, hej on wróci.
Naprawdę tak myślisz.
I ta myśl może sprawić, że wstaniesz. Ale gdy to robisz zobaczysz szare, deszczowe niebo, które tak kochał. Zobaczysz bukiet zwiędniętych irysów, które tak kochał. Zobaczysz jego zdjęcie na którym uśmiechał się tak jak ty to kochałeś. Jego oczy będą błyszczeć na tym zdjęciu. Za to twoje znowu będą pochłonięte przez morze łez, które nieproszone będą spływać po twoich policzkach.
I ponownie nie będzie ci się chciało wstawać.
Wszystko co jest wokół ciebie będzie powodować że będziesz wierzyć w to że on jednak wróci. Że go ponownie zobaczysz. Ale to wszystko to tylko piękna iluzja która nie jest w żaden sposób realna. Bo przecież.
Bo przecież on nie żyje. Jego wszystkie akcje życia zostały zatrzymane wraz ze zderzeniem tego piekielnego pojazdu z barierą ochronną. A ostrzegałeś. Przestrzegałeś żeby nie siadał w tym stanie za kółkiem. Wiedziałeś że skończy się to źle, ale nie dopuszczales niczego gorszego niż pierwsze strony gazet które mówiły by o zatrzymaniu popularnego członka zespołu.
I przewidziałeś te nagłówki.
Ale nie takie. Nie mówiące o tym że jego życie skończyło się dnia 26 marca o godzinie 23:07 na Moście Westminsterskim. Że świadkowie byli przerażeni tym ogniem. Że sami strażacy byli wstrząśnięci.
To wszystko nie tak. To nie tak miało być i doskonale o tym wiedziałeś. Żałujesz pewnie że twoje ostatnie słowa do niego to nie było kocham cię tylko jak jesteś nierozważny i bezmyślny. I o zgrozo. Że chciałbyś go już nigdy nie ujrzeć jeśli to ma tak wyglądać.
Teraz żałujesz. Żałujesz bo mimo że go ujrzałeś to już nic nie mogłeś powiedzieć. Nie mogłeś przeprosić i prosić o wybaczenie. Może by się uśmiechnął tak jak to robił zawsze tylko dla ciebie i jego usta by naznaczyly pocałunek na twoich ustach.
Ale doskonale sobie zdajesz z tego sprawę, że już nie będziesz miał okazji tego doświadczyć.
Bo jego prochy już zniknęły pod warstwą piachu. Możesz teraz jedynie płakać nad grobem. To jedynie ci zostaje. Nic więcej. Wszystko nagle staje się takie samo, prawda? Kolory się zlewają, ale nadal świetnie umiesz rozpoznać jego kolor oczu. Tego pięknego odcienia czekolady nie da się zapomnieć ani z niczym pomylić.
Czasami zastanawiasz się o czym myślał w sekundzie uderzenia. Czy myślał o tobie. Jeśli tak to co takiego? Czy wyklinał? Czy może wyznawał ostatnie kocham cię?
Ale nie dowiesz się tego. Już za późno. Wszystko się skończyło. Nie ma już nic. Pozostał jedynie ból i pustka.
Oraz te zwiędnięte irysy.
Kochał irysy i dlatego je tutaj masz.
Wyobrażasz sobie chwile przed śmiercią że jesteś tymi irysami a on wodą. A raczej jej brakiem.
Irysy i woda.
Niall i Zayn.
I wszystko staje się jasne. Idealne. Teraz jest tak jak ma być. Irys z wodą. Woda z irysem.
A potem się budzisz.
Nie masz wody.
Ale przyzywczajasz się. Uczysz się egzystować. I może to nie jest do końca dobre ale jakoś trzeba żyć.
Nawet bez wody.

結果 (英文) 1:

Sometimes you have so that you are lying and you want to get up but everything seems to be ordered against you? That everything suddenly wants to make you accidentally did something? However, this all has a beginning. You can, for example, be tired after a hard workout. Or after a long day at work. Or because you're sick.However, all of this can also be associated with loss. Your mind concludes that since the who was Your oporą suddenly disappears. He is not. Bum and everything becomes dull and pointless. I don't even want you to get out of bed.But do you think, Hey, he's come back. Really like you think. And this thought can make you get out. But when you do it you will see a grey, rainy sky, which I loved. You'll see a bunch of zwiędniętych irises, which I loved. You'll see his photo that was smiling just like you you have loved. His eyes shine in this photo. For your again will be swallowed up by the sea of tears, that unsolicited will run down on your cheeks. And again you will not want to get up. Everything around you will cause you to believe that he will come back. That you'll see it again. But it's all just a beautiful illusion which is not in any way real. Because, after all. Because he's dead. Its all life shares have been detained along with the collision of the vehicle with a protective barrier of hell. And ostrzegałeś. Przestrzegałeś not to sit in this State behind the wheel. You know that will get it wrong, but I do not dopuszczales anything worse than headlines that spoke to a detention of a popular member of the team.And przewidziałeś these headlines.But not so. Not talking about the fact that his life ended on 26 March at 23: 07 on Westminster Bridge. That viewers were horrified by this fire. The firefighters were shocked.It's all wrong. It's not supposed to be and you know about it. Wish you were confident that your last words to him, it was not I love you just as you are inconsiderate and thoughtless. And horror of horrors. You want it you will never see if it is supposed to look like. Now you regret. You regret because although you have seen it, it's nothing you could say. Have you tried to apologize and ask for forgiveness. Maybe smiled as he always just for you and his mouth by naznaczyly kiss on your lips. But you seem perfectly aware of it, that you will not have the opportunity to experience it. Because his ashes have already disappeared under a layer of sand. Now you can only cry over the grave. It is only those. Nothing more. Everything suddenly becomes the same, right? Colors to blend, but still great you recognize his eye color. This beautiful chocolate hue, it is impossible to forget, or with nothing to confuse. Sometimes wondering what he thought in the second impact. Have you thought about you. If so, what? Or wyklinał? Or perhaps professed last I love you? But I will tell you this. Already too late. Everything is over. There is no longer anything. Only pain and emptiness. And those wilted irises.Loved irises, and here you have them.Imagine the moment before his death, that you are the irises and the water. Or rather the lack of it.Irises and water.Niall and Zayn.And everything becomes clear. Ideal. Now it's as it should be. IRIS with water. Water from an IRIS.And then you wake up.You do not have water. But przyzywczajasz you like. You learn to subsist on. And maybe it is not good but somehow you need to live. Even without water.

結果 (英文) 3:

You are sometimes so that you are lying down and you want to stand but everything seems to be ordered against you? That everything suddenly wishes to make you case something he didn't do that? However, all of this is a start. For example, you can be tired after a heavy workout. Or after a day at work. Or because you are sick.
but all of this can also be associated with a loss.Your brain finds that, since the person who was your oporą rapidly disappears. There is no it. minefield and everything becomes gray and does not serve any purpose. Even though you don't want to get out of bed.
but you think, hey he shall return.
Really so you think.
AND this thought may make it come down. But when you do this you will see gray, rainy sky, which so loved her. You will see a bouquet of irises, which wilted so loved her.You will see the picture on which was still smiling as you kochałeś. His eyes will shine in this photo. For this your back will be absorbed by the sea tears, which unsolicited will drain after your cheeks.
AND again you will not be wanted to get up.
Everything that is around you will cause that you believe in, however, is that it is returned.That you will see it again. But all this is just a beautiful illusion that is not in any way real. Because it is.
Because, after all, he's dead. Its all shares of life have been detained, together with vehicle impact the hell of protective barrier. A ostrzegałeś. Przestrzegałeś not to he shall sit in this state behind the wheel. Did you know that you're out to be a bad,But not dopuszczales anything worse than the headlines that speak to a popular member of the team is stopped.
AND by adding an those headers.
but not such. Not saying that his life is ended on 26 March, at 23:07 on the bridge decked. That the witnesses were they were pricked in their fire. We are firefighters were shocked by.
it all not so.This is not meant to be so great that you know. Wishing you could use some confidence that your last words to him that it was not I love you just as you are an ill-judged and bezmyślny. And of horror. That you'd like to never see if it already has this so look.
Now wishing you could use some. Wishing you could use some because even though it is already ujrzałeś nothing you could say.You couldn't apologize and ask for forgiveness. Can that came to him as he always just for you and his mouth to naznaczyly kiss on your mouth.
But perfectly to come back to this matter, you will no longer have any opportunity this experience.
Because his ashes PIACHU already disappeared under a layer. Now you can only weep over the grave. It is only you.There is nothing more. Everything suddenly becomes the same, isn't it? The colors merge, but still very well knowest thou recognize its eye color. This beautiful shade chocolate not to forget nor to anything confused.
Sometimes wondering what he thought about the second impact. Whether he thought about you. If so, what is that? Whether wyklinał? That may confessed last i love you?
But this is the place to find out. It was too late. Everything happened. There is nothing. There is only pain and emptiness.
And those wilted irysy.
loved irysy and therefore it here you.
you imagine moments before his death that you are those irysami and on water. A rather lack thereof.
Irysy and water.
Niall and Zayn.
AND everything becomes clear. Ideal. It is now so as to be. Iris with water.Water from irysem.
and then you wake up.
you have no water.
But przyzywczajasz. Learn may exist within a. And this may not be the end of good but somehow he must live.
Even without water.